The in-between. The void. This can mean so many things.
I have a lot to say to this, in so many ways, in regards to so many differing life situations, in so many areas of life.
There is one area that I feel like touching upon first.
It’s one that is very dear to my heart, close to my own experience, and close to the experience of some wonderful women I know.
I have been doing several courses on polarity by now, I am still studying to become a certified tantra teacher (I am close to the finish line), and I have been consuming countless books on the topic of polarity and relationship…
Why am I telling you this?
On this journey, I learned how to potentially create polarity in a relationship, how to be in a relationship, and how I shall behave in order to attract my future partner in no time.
Thing is, I have been deeply yearning for a relationship for a while now. It’s not about being patient or trusting. These are things that are easily said by anyone in a relationship, or by anyone not really aspiring to be in one on a deeper level.
And so these books and teachings make it seem so easy, like being on your own is a little transitioning period and even if you are not in a relationship just now, you probably have been in many of which you can draw upon from experience.
This doesn’t apply to me. Even though I have this deep yearning, I have never been with someone more than three months and this has only happened on three occasions in total.
And still my heart tells me that I am ready, because you don’t need to have everything figured out first, you don’t need to have healed all your wounds or become the perfect person. In my truth it all comes down to awareness. As long as you are aware, you are ready because you can face all kinds of situations and can have all kinds of differences with a potential partner and you can work with them when they arise as long as you and your partner are willing to figure this out. And in any case you can read through all those books, and take all of those polarity courses and it might help you with your relationship too.
So what if you are in the in-between, what if you are yearning for your partner and you can feel him but he isn’t there yet. What is it with that time. Aren’t we always in the in-between? Isn’t life the “in-between” itself? (Just a few questions to ponder upon.)
What can we do in the here and now to hold ourselves? To become softer. To trust in the moment that we are in. What if you stop looking into the future, stop the search? Truly, my heart tells me, we collectively are allowed to stop the search. It does not fill our hearts, it does not spark joy nor happiness.
And whilst I am learning to be here. To be present. I am here to guide you in this space as well.
I don’t want us to be afraid anymore, or to stay with relationships which aren’t serving us, I also don’t want us to be scared of being alone, nor do I want us to believe we’ll be alone forever.
I desire to guide us in space - in the present moment. Dropping into ourselves.
I don’t want to hear one more - be like this and he will come. I desire to call upon the present space - there is nothing else we have.